China Doll
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
today wokr up dman late. 9.40am. quickly bath and change den pia cab down J8. i went there to relief. Joyce is v nice. So is Rain aka Lor Hor =X hahha... so long nv go J8. spotted a few yoyo. ahhaaha.. =X den went to 77th street bought a new naval stud. shown below!! chio boooo? cost me $24.90 heheheheh~ but mebbe wait a fe wmore wk den change. cos now abit buay steady. scared infection dne have to close the hole jitao waste $63 liao. cannot afford ahhh~ =X
im uber tired. tired. tired. tired.
China Doll
Monday, March 28, 2005
woke up in early afternoon. slack. went down to TM to pei angel. saw min fei. hmmm... went to missha spent over $40+ wat the hell.
happy for eric. think he enlightened himself. tts gd. enjoy life while u can.
mama nag and nag. wats up with her.
slack da whole day. evenin time, i was lyin in bed. browsin thru my hp msges. den i realised how dumb of me to keep his messages that dated back to last xmas? so one by one, i read thru all the messages and delete it. it pains me so much to do so. cos those messages were so sweet. on the other hand, i knew i had to delete all those to move on. yepz. and i will only delete those sms-es. frenster testimonials and entries here will not be deleted. they serve as memories that i once had. den i recalled how he played mahjong and at the same time chat with me? i can hear the noisy tiles bangin den suddenly he will "PENG" wtf. -.- make me jump at that time. come to think of it i find it funny.
den i remembered how we sms thru the night durin his grandma's funeral. hmm... how i tried my best to console him and stuff. i teared again. cant help me hai and hai.
baby why would u hurt me so long.
got to noe that anicia quarrelled with huifang. huifang got her retribution. haha. i love anicia's attitude. i've been toleratin huifang too. actually she's not v v v v bad. as in some things that she does really piss ppl off like shit. aww.. how i wish anicia could come back and work. she's nice to crap around with. hurhur.
China Doll
i had a dream. i dreamt that my dad was screwin another woman in da master bedroom. wtf.
China Doll
today rosabel came over to relief. to my horror, i found out that i have changged. really changed this time. i became so mean. meanie me. was it because tt goh hui huang influenced me? or was it my own way of entertainin myself? i dunnoe.
den after work, i boarded that damn freezin bus. got down near TM walked to Mac got myself a packet of fries. so with that packet of freshly fried fries, i walked home. with the earphones of my discman tuck neatly in my ear. The disc playin Zhang Dong Liang's Shou Xuan. my all time fave disc. den i wondered, why isit that im always alone on da way home? why isit that there's no new messages for me (not includin those my mum and frens sent me). why isit that my phone doesnt rings as often? den i wondered, why i am who i am. gd quest. no one can answer me that question. wtf.
ahhhh.im bored im bored. i need life. i need a life~
played Duan Dian durin work. abit cannot take it. tears almost drop. as Lao Ren (who is he? ask me. and u will noe =D) said i can put all this down de. but i replied "somethings are jux freakin har to put down. esp. someone that had given u beautiful memories."
It's so tirin to be acting so rationally. u need to keep on thinkin and thinkin. it is jux so tirin. how i wish one day, i can jux free my emotions. but on the other hand, i have to think rationally abt the consequences. contradictin yea.?
wat the hell.
China Doll
Sunday, March 27, 2005
im bored to death. my life's like.. totally sooo... bland. wat the hell. can someone come and spice up my life? mebbe come a guy who has got a nissan fairlady? or suzuki hayabusa? nahz.. jux jokin. even if i wanna have fun my mum's gonna kill me. let alone sittin on a bike and pillion? yea. haiz.
pay day's gonna. yippies. smth to feel excited abt. new naval stud, here i come. anna sui blusher, here i come!! im more excited over my naval stud. wat design im gonna get? danglings or not? haha. shoppin shoppin shoppin. shoppin's gonna make me happy! i wanna be happy. but as i was tellin anicia, some things its hard to put down. -sigh- i wanna go on with my life. why i cant!!! WHY! -sings- "TELL ME WHY~ AINT NTH BUT A MISTAKE~ TELL ME WHY~ AINT NTH BUT A HEARTACHE~ " big big mistake.
i need cash. i need cash. i need cash. u peeps out dere. stfu .
China Doll
Friday, March 25, 2005
really dunnoe wat to write le. v.. empty.. keep thinkin. thinkin and thinkin and thinkin and thinkin.. -drift off-
China Doll
Forever is like fairytales. it is smth that nv exist. yet so many ppl like it so much. im one of them. i dun believe in forever. yet i like this word so much. cos it is smth that will never exist in my life and i yearn for it to happen.
China Doll
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
its sucha eventful day. slack in town. sit down talk with angel lor. dunnoe whether i shld feel happy or sad. today i called him. so happy to hear his voice. but he cant remember me. angel says he act blur. i say he heartless. but felt so relieve. at least i told him smth that i wanted to tell him. but he stil din reply my messages.
den in the mornin. smth unfortunate happened to eric. feeel so sad for him. life goes on.
spend money to release my unhappiness. kns. spend again lor. bought a ring with mua name engraved. angel had one too. bought a belt. bought a hp sling. bought a pouch. wat the hell. money money money.
i still miss him. =(
China Doll
am a slacker for the day. went to CSQ to relief. Joslin's a nice incharge. took break with angel. den after that slack at mac with angel. finally tml off. but need to go out nua and write script. whaha.. script. -.-
brain gonna shut down liao.
chillll babe. gonna pierce mua nose sooooonnn.. whaha. =X pay date gettin closer. lotsa things to buy. naval stud. remover. new blusher. blusher brush. blah blah blah.
China Doll
Sunday, March 20, 2005
worked an afternoon shift today. Jo came to relief!!! muahahaha tts why im a happy worker today. =D she permed her hair!! so laydee like. heeee.. she's so nice. tml im goin to BJ to relief. hoho~~~~ ah neh and xiaohuuiiiiiI~ LOL! =Xso i wun get to see anicia. haha bahz... who cares. i care more abt BJ. muahaha..
haha. honestly, i feel that Jo is gettin pissed by goh hui huang. hurhur. gd fer her. she irritates ppl easily. as i mentioned in my previous entry. can see the frown on Jo's face. whahah. and i realised that adeline love to stare at me. wth. smth wrong with my makeup or wat? kaoz. althou she did nth wrong but she makes me feel so uncomfortable. liew.
went to S&K reserved a hipster jeans. uber hipster. liek it alot. get pay liao den buy. den was talkin to the staff lor. they played
China Doll
here's the startin of my ramblin and screamin.
WORK TODAY WAS LIKE SHIT! nabei. jitao dulan like crazy by my incharge. wat the fuck. 22 yrs old liao wann act like 12 yrs old. constand of actin cute and sa jiao. wat sia. i 16 yrs old can also be more mature den u. wtf nia. tease me once tease me twice i dun give a shit. but teasin me for one whole day with the same thing over and over again. WTH!!!!! SO MUCH SALIVA?!?!?! jitao is gam pua dulan.
plus, my contribution to the shop was taken granted for. i packed the store nice nice and ppl complain that i snatched her job away. fine. from now on i shant care about that whole damn store again. messy or not IM NOT GOIN TO PACK IT AGAIN. okaes, by tt time dun come and say: "boon got time go pack store room hor" im only goin to give u 2 words FUCK YOU. and by that time dun complain to JO that im not doin my job well k.
and GOH HUI HUANG i noe u are jealous that i have a girl look and u got that stupid chubby face of urs. and i dare to say im prettier den u. and u green with envy for my girl-girl face u said that i act like a boy. U HAVE A BOY-BOY FACE AND IS DESPERATELY TRYIN ACT GIRL. aww.. c''on accept the fact that u AINT CUTE PRETTY ATTRACTIVE or wat-so-ever. u jux piss me off with all that fake accent and act cute plus act chio. i have respect for the word INCHARGE but for a person like u. all you do is jux gossip and gossip. hope ur mouth rot soon.
weeeee.. i feel so fine now. monday goin to BJ to relief!!! mua home! heeee~ =X shoo happy.
China Doll
Friday, March 18, 2005
| You Are A Good Friend |
 You're always willing to listen Or lend a shoulder to cry on You're there through thick and thin Many people consider you their "best friend"! |
What'>http://www.blogthings.com/whatkindoffriendareyouquiz/">What Kind of Friend Are You?
China Doll
aight. today. everything'a fine. woke up 12 pm. wanted to slp longer. den i remembered i have lotsa things to be doin. wat the heck. lOlx. went down to CSQ accompany angel to have her break lor. den saw jieying!! *MUACKZ* (PS: she's not my colleague that jieying.) guess she's havin some probs. watever it is cheer up girl~ u have me! well, not only me u have. many many other gd frenz =D. hahah den she said smth "2 damsel in distress" hahaha~
recently i stumble in this blog. by a girl name wendy aka xiaxue. she's pretty. and i love her language. but she's crude. haha. amazing huh. how can a babe write such perfect english? cos she's a jounalist. her blog was once featured in papers. famous.
aight. and i got to noe that one of my best guzheng fren she had OCD. thats is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. haiyo. wat happen sia. *shake head*
and i had already make a decision. make everything stop. i felt like a fool. and i shouldnt be. suddenly, i feel so enlightened. mua gawwwddddd wats happenin man. but im still troublin whether i should sms or use a foreign number and call him? hmm.. watever i'll jux writ emy script out. not soundin harsh but firm. the outline would be me askin wat he wan. and if dun give a damn to watever shit relations we had b4 Or our FRENSHIP. thats it. we will take it that we nv met each other. lead our own life.
YEA THATS IT!!!!! ENOUGH IS ENOUGHHHHHHH!!!! IM SO HAPPPPYYYYYYYY!! GONNA BE OUT OF THIS MISERABLE SOOOONNNNN! WHAHAHHAHA -dance and dance- i'll post wat i am goin to say/send to him and ask for u peeps comment b4 i'll give him all the shit. HOHOHOHO!!
China Doll
Thursday, March 17, 2005
wake up in da morning
cant help but keep on yawnin
feel so lethargic
wat am i gonna do.
This is the lyrics of a song done by Perfect10. haha. like it alot. finally. tml an off. feel as if im gonna break down any moment. forgive me for the past few post. was sooo... irritatin? da yi ma came. mood swings. was worst den wat i have expected. i feel so sorry for myself. i pity myself. why am i goin thru all this shitz. i dun get it. works fine. relations with parents and siblings fine. but is it still that i v extremely incomplete, broken and..... unloved. thinkin rationally, i noe im being loved, by my frens by my family members. but, everything inside me so empty. why. bu zhi dao.
honestly, i still miss him lots. i dun get it. why is he still avoiding me? wat i have done wrong? i dunnoe. mebbe i did smth worng unknowingly. but cant he jux lemme noe? or isit that he did smth wrong? haiz. this time use finger predict also cannot. haiz. i've tried forgettin everything. but each time i here certain songs i'll be so reminded. wat the hell.
work was borin. sales was 2 thumbs down. talk alot. am bein abit irritated. who cares. dance to techno, r&b. practisin for my future =X. saw shum wai hong boon and daniel. guess they came to wait for wee keong. i almost shouted "OEI U OWE ME CIGGIE!!!" when i saw daniel. lmao. =X
argh. everything jux kinda suck now.
China Doll
Wednesday, March 16, 2005
was readin Zhang Xiao Xian's novel
anyway, this morning while i was waiting for my incharge rosabel to open door at Parkway ebase, a group of funny guy came to take number. indeed they were v farni. make me luff. ha ha. nahz... nth much. shant elaborate anymore.
work was fun with rosabel. lotsa talkin and playin around. bored anyway. so talk lor. there was a bulk purchase. $421. tsk tsk, rich ppl.
aight. i've got the pics on da sentosa trip with cher bird and bao. of cos, gonna ch0ose the nice one. duhh~.
okae... the main thing here is da sunset. not me with t little twist yea? lOlz.
me and cher din go down to water. so we decided to zi lian abit.
ghahha... mua SEXY back view erpx. =X
me and bao doin funny faces. funny hor... =X
me.. cool beh? =X
Here are the sunset pictures taken by me.. =D
nice hooorrr...
China Doll
B O R E D
S O
F U C K E D
U P
P L S
D O
N O T
B I T C H
I N T O
M Y
L I F E.
for gdness sake. its my life.
China Doll
Monday, March 14, 2005
Take the What Fruit Are You? test by Ellen!
imma strawberry. =)
China Doll
early morning, woke up 7am took bus to ngee ann poly. butt almost rotted. den went home pack my stuff, went to sentosa at around evenin time. had lotsa pictures taken. upload them once i received da pic. wore da billabong bikini. saded. so little ppl at sentosa. no yoyo to see. sian lo. but beautiful sunset i saw. lotsa pictures taken~ await~
anyway, my written test for mass comm a goner. kao. when tsunami happened? i dun even noe. abit pathetic. no hope. tml mornin go to TP de media and communication interview. no much hope lor.
haiz. na de qi, fang bu xia. =(
China Doll
Sunday, March 13, 2005
im dead. for gdness sake. tml's my written test for mass comm. wat shitz. i dun even noe wat they testin. test my compo my vocab my grammer? ARGH!. haiz. sure wun pass de. why like tt. den angel said write like how i wrote in my blog minus off all da singlish. dortz. kns de. den tuesday my interview for TP de CMM. haiz. stressedddd~. how.. tml mux wake up so early go NP. sian. try take 67. cos straight bus but i dunnoe where to get off.. how... fan si ren.
can someone jux tell me wat im gonna be tested. lemme have aclue. at least lemme be prepared. if not go dere with pen den dunnoe wat to write. i stare at paper paper stare back. abit jialat lor. moreover competition so stiff. haiz. sure alot of language pro de. me go dere majiam small fry. hoooowwwww....
wat a helpless entry. booo
China Doll
congratz me. i've been shortlisted for TP's media and comm and NP's mass comm. have to go interiew and written test. im dead. i din read the straits time for like how long manz.
tpday work at Bugis was happy. i miss BJ so much. but my day was spoiled by some china ppl. 2 word for 'em FUCK OFF. i can dun do ur business. watever happen. da ren bu ji xiao ren guo *hmpH* *cool down*
today while workin in BJ, saw my grandma, grandpa, bb, auntie, xiaoping, and xiaoying. hurhur. den saw jan jie den saw shiqi. kaoooo.. i love workin at BJ.!!!! mua home. den ah neh wrote in message book:
Cashier: Shuhui/Boon *welcome home*
how sweet was that!! melted manz. den ah neh told me the first day i wasnt at BJ, they missed me. and they had no one to do da sewing. miss xiaomin sooooo much. so long nv see her ler. =( Love BJ LOTSSS!!!
China Doll
Friday, March 11, 2005
bleah. sick and tired.
leave.me.alone.
China Doll
Thursday, March 10, 2005
congratz angel. got her job at missha. visit her today. wasin feelin v well for da whole day. grandmama and grandpapa come my hse.
ytd well workin, a guy aka lao ahbeng came into our shop and had a chat with rosabel. he said smth that makes sense. "For girls, wait for guys to love u. Dunch ever love a guy who dun love u at all." and he repeated it all 3 times. 2 times in chinese 1 time in hokkien. mebbe, thats shld be the way.
-Duo Ai Ni, Ni Que Bu Shi Wo De Shui-
China Doll
Fang Xia Ni You Duo Nan, You Duo Tong.
Ni Bu Zhi Dao Wo Yi Zhi Dou Zai Xiang Ni.
I realised how much im missing you.
China Doll
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
i think i gettin weirder. wats wrong with me.
First, all of ya will get a shock if i say this. recently, i've been into veggie. yea and i mean it. been eatin lotsa veggie. my lunch my dinner. each time i see meat i gets abit fan wei. like i eat yong tau hoo, i 7 items, 4 veggies. wahhh.. really. and i love eatin fruits too. strange. drank lotsa fruits drinks. fresh one somemore. as u peeps noe, i use to be one hella meat lover. kao. wat has become of me.
Second, i've been spendin nonstop. not intendin to control. spend like no body's business. whenever i use to buy smth real ex or not of gd use, i feel my heart breaks. but now, i can jux use my nets like i had lotsa money. wth.
Third, haben been bio-ing ydk. suddenly lost interest le. isit that parkway does not have any ydk? but even if i were to be shoppin in orchard, i dun look around. kao....
Fourth, i've been gettin pissed and irritated, losin my temper everynow and then, easily. thats not like me in da past. when im able to think rationally and control myself. as in, i tend to be scoldin peeps for every little things. but i dun scold them as in SCREAM at them la. but jux mumblings of cursin and swearings.
Me, changed so much. ever since when. i dunnoe. im angry with myself for all that happened. i blamed myself for watever happend. it take 2 hands to clap. im at fault.
anyway, angel, tt kuku ger *LUFF* wans me to pon work. so i told her "pon work = hu si luan xiang" den she gave me "no work = pei angel=crazy da=lotsa laughter=no stress= HAPPY HUEY WEN!" lousy reaction hahaha.... no work = no money.
-Wo shou le zhong shang, dui ai yi bu zai ke wang-
it been a long time. since i was being called dear. as i was blog hoppin. i stumble upon this ger blog. she's attached. and her boy left her a msg in her taggie. "dear dear, got miss me ma? muackx muackx" abit mushy hor. i suddenly miss gettin this kinda msg. mebbe im too used to his msg le. every mornin, i will see his msg. every night after work, i will see his msg. suddenly, *poof* all those became history. i remembered he likes to ask me the above question. den i will always reply "got la. abit la. hahaha" yea. come to think of it, how sweet, how memorable those days were. once, he was watching movie halfway. it was dinner time. he sms-ed me "dear mux remember eat ur dinner k? me watchin movie now." and i replied "yea.. eat already. u also mux eat arh. dun everytime skip ur meal ah! u go see ur movie ba. dun disturb u. miss ya" sometimes when he was out havin fun with his fren and he got abit drunk, he will msg me 4am+ 5am+. so each time i woke up from mua beloved slp. but i wasnt angry at all. i was not frustrated. cos it was his msg that i received. if it were to be by other ppl. i wun bother to reply. however, i would get so happy. piao ah piao. he knows i like to use this phrase. he made fun of me. haha. how nice. however, all this nv come back to me ever again. baby, u will nv be replaced.
-Wo shou le zhong shang, dui ai yi bu zai ke wang-
China Doll
Monday, March 07, 2005
finally, had my JAE done. went back home den slp again. piggy for da day. kukunathan. my papa keep come in wake me up. only slp till 1.30pm only. where got song. sian-ed. stay at home kanna nag. uber turnoff.
congratz david aw. he got his ger. and he actually thinks i like him. wat the heck seh. -.- pissed off for da day.
Msg to angel and poh leng:
ahh.. me, u and poh leng = women of da same fate. we suffered the same kinda fate, thats why we were bonded together as best fren by destiny. no matter wat happens, we shall hold on strong. not goin to fall. trust me. we will be loved. =)
me. at kbox tampines with angel =O. im wearin a tube top for goodness sake.
in love with this kinda doll.
this is so artistic. abit morbid thou. hahaha... i love this pic so much.
China Doll
Sunday, March 06, 2005
i hate parkway. it is freakin borin. it is freakin messy. esp the store. and i dun like my incharge. suck. lucky weekeong dere also. den we today take bus together. hahha.. den i keep saying "zi ji hui jia fan xing fan xing"den he keep luff. talk abt usual stuff lor. boreded.
lucky tml goin wisma. den meet up with eric treat him. i owe him one big meal. haha =D. tired.
China Doll
Friday, March 04, 2005
Had a fun night at ktv last night. abit pekchek thou. got abit high. but who cares. lala. have fun jiu hao. parkway is real borin. kao. cant stand it at all. how am i goin to survive! gosh. help me.
today relief at CSQ. equally bored. fiona tan came down see ehr face sian 1/2 liao. bought MM kao. blardy ex. den ben came down. jux to erm meet me for a while? so durin my break, after i had a stick, i had another stick with him. wahh.. mux control. den rosabel found out. dortz. feel abit guilty. hmmm...
den angel and eugan came down. den i went to buy bags. 2 for $23. cheap de wor. nic elor. whether gd to use i dunnoe. anyway cost only $23. who cares. wanted to buy shoes. cant find. still have not buy some top from Giodarno. damn it.
i wan a new naval stud. i wan new clothes. i wan more cosmetics. i wan more money. fuck. why is money always not enough. alone liao. ho kaichong u ass. jux tell me wat is happenin. ok, i noe i sound irritatin. cos i feel so empty feel so lost. i wan all my dears baobeis darlings come back. =(. will all these come back to me? will u be back? i dunnoe.
now i have to save up. haiz not enough money to eat. Here are the dos and donts.
Dos:
- spent less on unnecessary stuff
- bio more ydk to kill boredom
- eatmore maggie
- act cute less
- over-frenly. cos some ppl does not noe how to appreciate. k lor. den i go back to my dao dao de character liao.
Donts:
- spent so much
- stare into blank space.
- spent all my money on eating
- act cute
- be so frenly.
aint both da same? but i still have to cut and dye and highlight my hair. hai.
China Doll
Thursday, March 03, 2005
am v vex. poly wat course. im sure i wanna go poly. not jc.
here's my choices.
1 = mass communication (NP)
2 = Media and Communication (TP)
3 = Hospitality and Management (TP)
4 = Music and Audio Technology (SP)
5 = Accountancy (SP)
6 = Biomedical Science (TP)
7 = Optometry (SP)
8 = Retail Management (TP)
9 = nursing (NYP)
will this do? i also dunoe la. in need of advise. im runnin out of time. mass comm i have the passion. but the distance of sch form my hse really turn me off man. kaoz. i think tml midnight den apply liao lor. uber tired. have to show mum wats my decision.
China Doll
Tuesday, March 01, 2005
-3rd Wish feat Baby Bash-
-Obsession-
3rd Wish
Baby Bash
The ghetto mucho, ha
Son las cinco de la manana
Y no he dormido nada
Just thinkin' 'bout your beauty
Got me crazy in the head
El insomnio es mi castigo
Tu amor sera´mi alivio
Until you're in my arms, girl
I can have no peace in bed
It's five o'clock in the mornin'
I can't get no sleep
When I think about your beauty it makes me weak
I lay restless at home, without you there
Until you are mine, I'll find no relief [ooh]
[Chorus:]
Amor, si es amor
Your love's got me feelin'
Obsessed in my soul
Si es amor
not an illusion
That makes me do things
That my heart can't control
I know you're not my lady
But I'm full of hopes and maybes
Till onto your love can't save me
Solo puedo hablar de ti
Saw you with your 'amigo'
Girl he don't look so 'rigo'
No sabe complacerte, como lo haria yo
It's five o'clock in the mornin'
I can't get no sleep
When I think about your beauty it makes me weak
I lay restless at home, without you there
Until you are mine, I'll find no relief
[Chorus:]
Amor [si es amor]
Si es amor [si es amor]
Your love's got me feelin' [your love's got me]
Obsessed in my soul
Si es amor
not an illusion
That makes me do things
That my heart can't control
[Rap: Baby Bash]
When I feel so crack and I don't care what people say
When the revolution grab the cranket ticket trip tomorrow day
And we can, do it on the pictures, you know, how we gon' do
We go, act a fool, even when we run it cool
I hope, you favourite dress, listen
Pressed the turnal night up
Got a gucci bag, ucks mama stake
You stand that bar that ya there
Yea that I'm saying
Yea that I mean
Yea that I holler
And I'm so proud to say one day I'll be your baby's father
You fine
Es amor, es amor [te quiero mucho]
Es an obsesión [es an obsesión]
Es amor, es amor [3rd wish]
Es an obsesión
[Chorus:]
Amor, si es amor
Your love's got me feelin' [your love's got me]
Obsessed in my soul
Si es amor
not an illusion
That makes me do things
That my heart can't control
Amor, si es amor
Your love's got me feelin' [your love's got me feelin']
Obsessed in my soul
Si es amor not an illusion [3rd wish]
That makes me do things [baby bash]
That my heart can't control
Amor
-3rd Wish feat Baby Bash-
-Obsession-