China Doll
Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Marketing lecture early in da morning. *YawNz* I was actually expecting to be as interesting as the very first lesson. But *sIgH* what a let down. my lecturer just rush through everything and i had absolute no idea what the hell everything's about.
Bearly managed to survive through the whole lecture. Hurrah! Lecture ended! When down to biz canteen had our lunch. Made our way to Mac lab. A lab specially for CMM student. *HEHEHEHE* Essential Graphic WAS DAMN FUNNNNN! net surfing. chattins played around with the program. was learning how to use Photoshop. interesting. i love it! eheheh
After school met up with Emelia aka gf. Shopped around Tampines. Spend alot on jepalang de thingy. liek accessories, clips and necklace. *rool eyes* bought a Esprit beach bag and a belt. whoa.. think it's worth da money ba. use the bag for sch. the belt cost only $13.90!!! hehehe... lmao. i love spendingggg! hehe... i love day out with owen and emelia. damn funny. stupid actions and catchin game. HURHUR!
yea yea.. i can already hear all da naggin. shshshhsh
-STOP!-
i will control. and i will still eat. no worries. Huey Wen will be fine. =D she's a strong girl afterall! ^^
China Doll
Sunday, May 29, 2005
The past 2 nights had been HORRIBLE TERRIBLE VEGETABLE!
On friday night, i came back from work at bugis. which was absolute fun and crappy. Met a new colleague Stacy. Not v pretty at the first sight. but the more i look at her the more i think that she's charming. hee. she actually look abit like Lin Jia Xin. Whoa~ haha. check her out guys at Bugis Ebase. Oops =X
When i got home hog on da net for abt one hour. went to sleep. BEFORE I CLOSE MY EYES AND LET MYSELF FALL INTO LALA LAND! I FELT A SURGE IN MY STOMACH AND I RAN ALL THE WAY TO TOILET AND PUKE! All din just end here. so i tot everything was alright. so i went back to slp with the very ill-feeling in my tummy. i closed my eyes. await my lala king to bring me, the lala queen to lala land. i had to run to toilet and puke. so this goes on and on from 1 am till 3am. after 3 am i started wat we disgustingly call lao sai. -.- all the way till 6 am. i din sleep for the whole night. my limbs are numb and lifeless. i made a mess of the kitchen sink. din bother to clear up. was really too weak. cant move.
din go to work on saturday. saturday morning i was still pukin away. went to the doc. gave me 7 med. but i ate only 3. lalala... slept through the whole of saturday afternoon. just kept on sleepin. one word to describe. SHIOK! mebbe its because i overworked myself or smth. and i suspected it to be food poisonin. argh. watever la. din go to work on sunday too. hai ..no money liao lor.
was really sorry that i din go to work. cos i knew that we are now very short handed. and all the inconvenience caused to get staff travel to relief. partly also because of money la. haha..
HURRAH! i finish my marketing journal. which was absolute crapz and prawnz i tell u. i din noe wat to write. sigh. my english cannot make it. my language suck. sometimes i wonder if i will regret choosin this course not? hmm whatever it is, i will still try my best to improve my language. pls. i wanna go to University. *Pray*
China Doll
Saturday, May 28, 2005
I think i'm startin to have the habit of procrastinating. I'm suppose to type out my journal. Look at the time now. 12.30am. Im not asleep. Neither am i typin my journal. *sIgH* I actually wanted to do it in the morning. And then go to work. However i was told to go to Marina Square to handcarry stocks followed by bugis to relief.
so i rushed and made my way to marina square. The branch there is so classssyyy! *mUa GaWd!!!!!* my jaws dropped right to da floor. saw lindy. hahah how i missed her. *sIgH*. kaco and baleno attitude was cool.
my mind suddenly just *poof* everything disappears. i dunnoe wat to type anymore. pardon me.
HAIKAL IS SO CUTE! *skIpS aWaY*
China Doll
Thursday, May 26, 2005
Huey wen in da day compared to Huey wen at night. Totally different. I don't exactly know why. but when night sets in. when everything seems so dark and yet there are always artificial light shining. somehow it scares me. it got me thinkin of all the unhappiness. den i get all so depressed. i didnt want too. i cant help myself. i suddenly get so intimidated by poly life. im feelin so stressed. haha. how funny. im only in year one. wats there to worry abt? tons.
I need to study. i need to work. i need to join a cca and get my ass in university. how am i gonna commit? study work cca projects tutorials assessments. gosh.
worst of all, the problem im facin at home. i was disgusted at how often wats happenin at home are also experienced by many other peoply of my age. i know im not the only one facin the stress and havin all the worries. i feel useless i feel lousy.
pay day is coming. thank god. but when i look at how much i have to let go just to pay bills pay books i almost wanted to faint. thats not the kind of life i wanted. i want to spend on wat i like and obviously i cant. Life is definitely like shit right now.
i seriously need someone to guide and bring me through wats happening. i know i have my gorgeous frenz who were there for me whenever i needed them. nice right? but i wanted something more. from a guy. a caring mature guy. who will give me all the advises i needed. some one whom i noe will bring me into his hug and let me cry. someone who can tolerate my 'dunnoe la!' at night. someone i can crap and laugh with in the morning.
enough of all those saddy stuff.
BIG NEWS!
hehehhe i took the same bus with haikal the cutie! i said hi to him and we sat next to each other and talked!!! *faIntz* he is sooooo mesmerizin. fin dout where he lived told me abit of his SIP. he knew my name blah. but forgot to xchange contact !%^&*&*() bus journey was damn short. haiz.wasted
China Doll
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
me and angel at partyworld
it's been a long time since i last uploaded a pic. so decided to upload this pic me and my darling angel had taken at Chinatown Partyworld.
Angel was sweet. she gave me a card. with messages written at the back to encourage me. girl don't worry. i'll live on strong. so touched. u da best girl. eh girl! MY POOL SKILL SAMA SAMA AS U HOR! siao siao. i purposely let you win one k! haha *lmao*
I am being honest with myself right now. i really give up on HKC le. Really. i swear. i don't think about him anymore. i'll just let him live his own. he has got nothing to do with me anymore.
Things are not turning out the way i wanted. i wanted to numb myself. how?
China Doll
Tuesday, May 24, 2005
today is 24th may 2005. the day when my poly sch starts. the day, his birthday. i did message. no reply. he cheated me again. boo.
sch was alright. i just realised that Express 518 stops at TP. hehe.. no more squeezing in Bus 8 anymore! *hOorah!!!*
lesson was not too bad with Mr darryl david. comm&mediamarketing. chim hor. haha. we learned about customer value. whoch is the difference between the values customers gains from ownin and using the produt and the costs of obtainin it. hehe.
we went on to makin customers satisfied. if customers are satisfied with our performance they will make repeat purchases. YEAH! meaning more sales!!! Quote : "Promise what u can deliver then deliver more den u promise."
we also learned abt the different kind of need. The most basic would be Physiological need, safety need, social need, esteem need followed by self-actualization need.heeee CHIM HOR
we also had discussions on marketin management concepts.
Production Concept->That is improvement and efficiency.
Product Concept -> best quality and series of improvement
Selling Concept-> promotions.
marketing concepts -> figure out market sell it up.
Thats about it. i feel that i've learned quite alot in one lecture whooooooo!
VISIT MY BLOG K! IT IS SO BENEFICIAL!!!!!!
work was uber boring. CSQ sucks. boring. worked to lilac. despite my horrendous voice. i still talk alot. pestered daniel to treat me drink bubble tea. weee.
China Doll
Monday, May 23, 2005
too much ya kun toast + too much milo + too much maggie + too much french fries + so much spice = inflamed throat.
damn. i cant talk. i cant shout "HI WELCOME!" i cant shout "THANK U SEE YOU AGAIN" I LOST MY VOICE! JUST RIGHT B4 SCH STARTS!
dyin of fatigue soon.
sorry for the previous post. sounded very much desperate. hurhur
China Doll
NOTICE!
i am lookin for this guy studyin in business sch of TP. Year 2 if im not wrong. who wore a white cap on the 2nd day of business's sch orientation. had a yellow tongue stud i think. uber cute! *dRoOlz*
im workin like a full time instead of a parttimer. 44 hours of work for next wk. shitty shit.
China Doll
Saturday, May 21, 2005
BUSINESS OEI! OEI!!!
BUSINESS OEI! OEI!!!
BUSINESS OEI! XAT XAT PEI!!!
haha.. thats our cheer. many many other cheers also. too much le. i'll sum up the 2 days orientation. HEHE!
DAY ONE
went to da sch. queue for registration. was very warm and sweaty. met with char christ, mad fendi, ying xiu and jolene. but CMM got to go first. was so happy. went to TCC to sit. listen director talk cock. blah blah blah. den went to LT. met our Mentor (not mentos), SL and HL. Emelia, Vincent (the 2 i can click best with) vannesa and many many. they were great. i was in the same class with christ. lucky me =D AH! was a boring day!
DAY TWO (IT WAS LIKE WHOA!!!!!)
As the first day of orientation was extremely KNS! =X me was contemplating to attend the morning and skip the Olympia and Dragon Boat after lunch. den return for the Jam and Hop. but we were unable to run away. so sad. things turn out better between classmates. we are able to communicate much better. and christina and angeline was like tryin to pair me up with vincent. i must admit vincent is cute le. but Haikal is cuter xD! hahaha... HAIKAL'S A CUTIE! MUA GAWDDDD! *GASP* but i think he's together with kelly. awwww... so they were teasin me makin me so embarrassed.! *HmpH*. haha.. during the dragon boat race, me christ and char slipped to the sports complex toilet to shower. cos we were damn hot, sticky sweaty!!! hahah. i noe its a bit amazin. den we returned only when the whole thing was abt to end. HURHUR!! den we went to jam and hop.
IT WAS SO FREAKIN HAPPENIN! at first not much ppl dare to dance. they had the live band but me and angel wanted R&B. lotsa ppl wants that. haha. den FINALLY! TA-DA! R&B!!! hehe.. me and angel got so high that we kept dancin. ok. i admit. we were bio-ing yoyo also. haha... SO MANY omg. esp the guy in white *droOls* he can dance got da look. *WHOA* so we danced and danced jumped and jumped. den a few guys came dance. its my primary sch fren farhan! hahaha omg. he's still same. den he danced with angel and farhan's fren dance with me. haha. cooolllL! den farhan suddenly carried me up and started jumping. vincent and my gf aka emelia was nearby watchin too. super paiseh sia! den angel kanna sabo by farhan. cos got one guy we 2 keep bio-ing den farhan go pull that guy come. den make fren. zZz den got one short one take my number sian halfway. they wan dance with me i dun wan sia. den got a bunch of weird guy keep stand behind us. tryin to dance with me and angel also den i whispered to angel "eh quickly go dance with the guys next to us (which are the guys kanna sabo one).
den me and angel kept dancing face to face. i was worried that many ppl would think we are lesbian. HAHHA pls lo. =X
den went home at around 11pm. whooooooaaa HAPPENING! WE ARE QUALIFIED TO DANCE AND CLUB *EVIL LAUGH*
-the end-
China Doll
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
YA LA I LIKE TO CRY LA. ALL I NOE IS CRY AND CRY NON STOP LA> I DUNNOE ANYTHING ELSE. SO DUN ASK ME GO AND DO THINGS I DUNNOE HOW TO DO LA COS TO U I ONLY NOE HOW TO CRY NONSTOP. YESH I AM CRYBABY LA. BIG FUCK AH. NBCB.
China Doll
My handphone rang early morning. i was freakin tired. i slept at 3am last night. Undesirable incidents occurred again. Met Xiaomin and Siying at Tampines Mall Mac to have breakfast. Went down to Paya Lebar met the rest of the colleagues to go to warehouse to pack stock for the new outlet at Marina Square. Rachelle, Ai Chuan, Xiao min, Me, Siying, Su Pei, Melissa and some ppl from S&K came down to help. Warehouse was damn freaky dusty and hot. humid in fact. a few minutes inside made up sweat like crazy. den our body get sticky and very uncomfortable. eeeyerrr... So we started packing from 10am pack and pack and pack to 1 pm have lunch at the rundown coffeeshop. den continue to pack and pack and pack till 4pm near five den we went off. we damn lethargic. moreover i only slept a few hours.
I strongly disagree my fourth uncle comin to see my father. cos i noe he will definitely use violence. he's my father afterall. i wan nobody to get hurt. dun let me live in fear. i hate the feeling. i cant sleep at night. for fear that somethings will happen in da middle of the night.
but from this incident, im quite glad to see my younger bro being so obedient. he does his work. help abit of housework.
so helpless.
China Doll
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
day at the place where jasmine's workin, which is at TANJONG PAGAR, NEXUS PLACE was great.crap and laugh. ahhh~ i like laughing. despite lookin ugly when i laugh. sorry. i cant control. day out with aunt may, ke xin, xiang ling, yu xian, jasmine, xing yi and de quan. teasing and stuff. ate and ate. after that kexin, aunt may and de quan left. so left with me, xing yi yu xian and xiang ling. we decided to proceed to tampines and continue our talk cock session. *lmao*
went back home. mum din nag. dad din say anything. ironed my clothes. *whew* sweatin all da while.
tml goin to warehouse open stock for the new outlet at Marina Square (MSQ) gonna meet xiaomin for breakfast den go to Paya Lebar to meet da rest at 9pm. so damn early. wat shit. tml bro's gonna do braces. *sIgH*
stop askin me to make decisions. i dunnoe how make decisions ok! since young u are the people makin decisions for me. now i dun wan to make a decision yet u force me. i dun like fights i dun like quarrels. i hope everything can be settled peacefully. hopefully by the middle of da year. no point drag and drag. wtf. im damn pissed with wats happenin. being adult u all dunnoe how to think. compromise and accomodate OK! TMD. WAN ME BRING OUT SOCIAL STUDIES TEXTBOOK FOR U 2 TO READ NORT. nb. kan dulanz. angry.
pay day is so slow. i fuckin broke. i have already planned how i am gonna spend it. will post it up in my next entry. if i ever remembers =D
China Doll
back! taking things in my stride. controllin my emotions in a mature way. i swear i would be gd from now. im gonna study my ass off in poly. work my heart out for money.
for now, i hope that everything can be solved peacefully. not askin any relatives to be involved.
peace.
China Doll
Saturday, May 14, 2005
shitty shit. burnt to death already. my heart is bleeding. my mind is swirling. i cant breathe. help.
China Doll
Thursday, May 12, 2005
im happy to see u say "still remember you dun worry" but isit remembering me so impt? no. wats more impt if u still have my heart. im even happier that u called. not the part u asked "who are u AH?" but ur voice. the voice that i used to rely to heavily on. i dunnoe if i ever sound harsh yesterday. but i still wan u to noe i miss u.
i asked if u knew i was cryin when u called. pls dun get the wrong idea that i cried because of u. but just that other things happen and wanted very much to talk to you.
u said if i msg u u will sure reply. but i retorted that u always bluff me. its true. u didnt keep ur promises. but still i wanted to sms u tonight. wats better would be u the one who took initiative to msg me. for now, i caught a glimpse of hope on the very far end. xiang hui dao guo qu.
China Doll
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
its tough. to be accepting wats happenin. i knew this kinda thing would happen sooner or later. but i managed to convince that im one hella lucky with a together-yet-unbonded family. u peeps out dere sure say that there are many cases out there that is far worst den mine. yes yes yes. i noe all that..different people different emotions different mind.
i noe i have to accept wats happenin. but i cant. within sucha short period of time. everything happened like lightnin. i tot i would be much much more stronger after the guzheng incident. so wrong. im still a weak ass. i cant take wats goin on. why this kind of thing had to happen.
i dun wanna stay at home and face all this. i just wan to go away. far from all this shit. but i noe if i go away, am i being irresponsible as a sister as a daughter? i am desparately trying to think rationally. yet most of the time emotions overtake my mind. i cant help but cry. i feel so helpless. needed someone very much to guide me all the way. on the otehr hand i dun wish to talk abt this issues. it makes me feel so ashame. and i dun wan ppl to interfere so much. i dun wan to think of solution to everything. for fear that i might cause even more conflicts. i chose to keep quiet. watching the whole thing from a corner. yet this involves my family. caught in a dilemma. i dun wan to be at home and see those rantings and ravings. it pains me. my heart hurts. my mind swirls. i cant think. and i dun wan to.
take me away.
China Doll
I DUN WAN TO STAY AT HOMEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK ALL OFF YA
China Doll
Monday, May 09, 2005
fucked up. dulanz. shut up u ass-s out dere. things aint great for me. AND U PPL DUN ASK WAT THE FUCK HAPPENED.
China Doll
HAPPY MAMA DAY!
kkiex. 8th May. Mama day. but i was workin afternoon shift. But i woke up in da morning. pack my things as usual. den i fried some egg to go with bread and bak gua. nice leh! i like! den my younger bro woke up so i made some for him. sucha nice sis where to find. alamak.
rain heavy heavy! nice weather. went to work. mall had lotsa peeps. but little sales. sianz. slack round lor. time seems to crawl. lotsa families. damn crowded. worked with lindy and sally and rosabel. not too bad la. lindy v nice to talk to nehhh~ crap sia she. LOLZ.
Nail scratched me. dortz. no. I scratched myself with my own nails. i din even noe that. den my toenail broke. wtf. angry. become so short again. nail polish came off so quickly. angry.! argh!
tml im goin to suntec relief! damn freakin happy!!! get to see ah neh. den decide to bum around suntec. see wats new. hehe. but im broke. &*(!%^&*#$% saded. did i ever mention i bought my mama a $60 choco! kkeix. 30 flavours altogether. best part i get to eat it too. HoHO!!! =X
-i noe the answer myself. none of ya. dun come and give me those crapz anymore. i noe wat i wan now.-
China Doll
Sunday, May 08, 2005
I realised my blog title is gettin more and more meaningless. kao. bth. Day was fine. Except that i was pissed of by my incharge due to some SERIOUS miscommunications and misunderstandings. If only she can speak clearer. AND NOT MUMBLE~ @#$^&* I HAVE TO "HUH!?!?!??!?!" Actually my incharge is not that bad la. just that when she's nice she's real nice. when she's bad she's real bad that kinda extreme thingy.
den for the whole day of work, me and sally were on missions to bio 'yoyo' hahaha.. and i showed sally benny's photo. expected reaction. "OMG!!!" hahaha~ yea.
Angel's com down again. alamak. no blog to read. hurhur. neh mind. read one of my guzheng pal de blog. wat she said is her true feelings. Den i felt so lucky. Cos at that point of time when the incident happened, the closer pals stood by us. givin us moral support. If werent for them, i wouldnt be here typin my blog. I would be somewhere hangin my head low crying. wat a pathetic situation. i wun allow myself to sink into that kind of situation. i am strong. and i will. honestly i miss my guzheng pals tons. i miss playing guzheng. but i din touch my guzheng at home at all. because......... abit of me felt ashame of myself. another bit of me refrain myself from touching to not be reminded of da past. I still love guzheng. I still love my guzheng pals. I thank my teacher for imparting his skills to us. But there are always some unspoken and unwritten feelings within ourself. We knew it ourself. yet none of us spoke. Its a gd thing and a bad thing. Life is just so contradictin. Just so ironic. Making me so confused. Just keep on remindin myself "Some things are just the way it is."
Bu Zhi Bu jue de, wo chang chang qu dao ni de Friendster Profile. Chong fu de kan ni de profile he testimonials. Ji hu shi mei tian. wei she me? wo zhi ji zhi dao da an. yin wei wo fa xian wo bu liao jie ni. que ai ni ne me shen. Wo xi wang chong zhong neng zhi dao ni de shi qing. geng bu yao shuo ni xian zai sho zai zuo she me. den cong lai mei gao shu wo. wo bu zui wen. wo yao gei ni zi you tian kong. ye xu shi wo tian zhen. ye xu shi wo yu chun. dan wo qi dai 25th may. wo xi wang qi ji hui fa sheng. wo mo mo de qi dao, qi ji hui fa sheng.
China Doll
ghostt!
kawaii de ghost! haha
China Doll
Thursday, May 05, 2005
Everything is fine at home now. me and my mother. me and my brother. yepz. Peace at last. ^.^v
Slept till 1pm this afternoon. Ytd night chatted with eric till 3am if im not wrong. Very tired. Think my darling angel went missing liao. No msg or call from her. haha. No update for her blog too.
Watched tv for da whole day. Painted my nails and all those stuff. Im so depressed! Cant go out shoppin. Cos im broke. Despite being broke, i still got myself a pair of short from B.U.M for 15 bucks! i love the cutting. thou it is still not hipster. at least it fits. *yea yea!*
i cant wait for sch to open. dyin to take the very first time into my poly life. im growin up afterall! hehe.aight. i admit. i wan to go poly to see yoyo only. -.- hope TP got alot of yoyo! *prAy*
tml im headin down to marine parade library. so get some books to kill boredom. Read the 'Last Juror" by John Grisham. Not too bad. any nice book to recommend? Gonna die from boredom. No money no shoppin no pool session no starbuck slackin session. bored to death!!!!
China Doll
Its so hard. Time and time again, i deny so consistently that i forget him already. Over and over again, i tried convincing that i no longer think of him. Each time i browsed friendster and i came upon his, i will definitely looked into his profile. see if anything changes. But so what if he changed his profile. It has nothing to do with me. And i cannot do anything too. If im not wrong his birthday coming soon. 25th May. Should i send him a msg to wish him happy birthday? Should i not. haha. How funny.It's like 2 weeks to his birthday. Yet im already pondering over this question. In a dilemma.
I feel so stupid. I know that i have to put everything down. But it's like "how?" .All the time i would stare at his pic. I noe this sounds idiotic. But it is the fact. So many times. I told my friends that i have no one in mind. hahaha. wat a liar. I just cannot put down the past.
Ni wei she me yao gei wo na xie hui yi. bu kan huo shou de hui yi. ni ming zhi dao ni dui wo you duo zhong yao. ni que ne me bu li qing de li kai. rang wo dui ni de si nian ri yu xu ye bu ting zai wo nao hai li fan gun. Ni yi ge li you ye mei gei wo. jiu zhe yang li wo er qu. pao xia yi qie bu guan. pao xia wi dui ni de ai yu guan xin. wo zhi dao wo bing mei you ba wo dui ni de ai quan bu biao da chu lai. yi zhi dou bu gan ai. zhi dao yu jian ni. wo ren wei wo hen you ba wo. dan wo cuo le. zhe yi ci wo die de hen zhong. wo shou shang le.
China Doll
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
yepz its a monday. another monday blue. yepz. and it is a public holiday. Labour day. sianz. not fair. part timer work PH no extra leh. should give full timer more fair ma. *HmpH* feel so unfair for sally. went to town walk walk lor. nth much today also. i wanna go back to m'sia ith my cousin on 23rd leh. but sch startin on that day. sobz.
sort out my thinkings leh. chuan dao qiao tou zi ran zhi!! hehe. NARUTO!! geeee...
he changed his display pic leee... why no new pic. i wan to see how u doin now lerr... but no.. sobz. ah. forget it.
China Doll
Monday, May 02, 2005
Everytime suay things happen. all happen at the same time. abit cannot take it. to think kexin still say i strong. haha.. gonna breakdown any moment.
me = conscienceless. big fat liar. no integrity.
and everytime bad things happen. i will dream of him. not once but twice. haiz.